How to Make Sure Your Yoni is Ready for Penetration

It takes 20-40 minutes for a woman to become fully engorged and aroused.
This may come as a surprise, and hopefully inspires you to reconsider the length of your foreplay, both with self and partners.

With pornography and pure exploration as the primary sexual guidance for most humans, it’s often assumed that a woman simply being “wet” communicates her readiness for penetration, when in fact that is simply a byproduct of engorgement. So, natural lubrication is definitely a sign that your body is on its way to full arousal, but not necessarily complete in its process.

The process of engorgement is important for two reasons.

1) On a biological level, when the tissues of the pelvic bowl become engorged, increased blood flow becomes responsible for the delivery of oxygen, nutrients, and hormones!

The pelvic tissues of most women are starving for these three things, resulting in a number of ailments and imbalances.

However, when ample time is allowed for full arousal, the tissues are nourished in a way that allows them to move better, respond better, and experience sensation better.

If you’ve ever read about orgasms being a healthy thing for you - this is with the assumption that the body reaches full arousal first, allowing this nourishment of nutrients, oxygen, and hormones to impact the entire body.

2) A pussy that is penetrated too soon can not only result in physical pain, but emotional pain. A pelvic therapist will tell you that when a pussy is ready to receive, it will literally suck you in!

Perhaps it is physical, or perhaps a reflection of the emotional state.
In the work of vaginal de-armoring, women around the world are discovering experiences, both physical and emotional, literally stored in the fascia and deep tissue of their pelvises.

Particularly common, is the experience of being penetrated too soon, resulting in feelings of boundary violation, low self worth, and nervous system responses such as freeze/fawn.

While a quickie here and there might have seemed harmless before, it really doesn’t benefit the movement of women who desire to be opened sexually with the understanding that their pussies and hearts are not so separate, to heal the generations of women who have had their bodies taken advantage of.

Here’s how to tell if your pussy is really ready for penetration:
  • Your vagina is very wet, with little to no need for foreign lubrication.
  • Your labia majora (outer lips) spreads apart and flattens, revealing the clitoris.
  • Your clitoris is larger in size and firmer.
  • Your labia minora (inner lips) double or triple in thickness, revealing the vaginal opening.
  • The color of your vulva deepens in reddish hue.
  • Your opening of the vagina becomes softer.
  • You, the woman, consents to a YES.

Penetration includes hands and toys. Whether this includes a partner a not, it can be physically, mentally, and spiritually beneficial to allow the body to open slowly and fully.

It can be especially helpful to understand that the way your body becomes ready for penetration differs from the bodies of others. Consider experimenting with this process in the mirror or simply mentally noting your experience during your own pleasure practice. As you learn your process more intimately, you can begin to better advocate for your body moving forward.

If you have a partner, consider explaining the importance of this process and allow your pussy to unfold together. Perhaps you might learn something from the perspective of your partner’s experience that you couldn’t haven’t known alone!

Written by Megan Bloom
Instagram @bloomingwombs